The Life of a Pastor's Wife

The Elders at our church (Faith Bible Church) are always so great about encouraging the wives of the pastors/men in leadership at our church. They recently sent this out to all the wives of men in leadership, and I was so encouraged and challenged by it that I thought I would share it on here. It really applies to every wife who's husband is in leadership in the church. Hope you ladies are as challenged by it as I was....

There are a few things that we, as pastor's wives must consider, and should teach other women aspiring to be a Pastor's wife. This applies to every woman whose husband is in ministr

1. It is a hard business, a difficult calling. Do not do it unless you are

ready to make it about others and not yourself.

2. It is a call to primarily watch God use your husband and secondarily use you.

It is a Christlike humbling of yourself to watch him succeed.You must be willing to be behind the scenes and you must be willing to stand on the sidelines and cheer.

3. Everything you do, wear, say, write, listen to or promote must be helpful to

a majority of believers in the church (Understand how much God loves and seeks

to protect the body of Christ) There is no room for selfishness, vanity, disregard

for the weaker brother or independence.

4. You must be willing to bend and give. Hold nothing so dear, that it cannot

be sacrificed for the good of the church. Your preferences are good and fine,

but they can not be touted as the way things should be. You must give way to

the desires of others, many times, for their growth.

5. People will judge you. Let them think what they want. Win them over with

Christ-likeness and love. Know and understand God and his love for you and

be satisfied with Him alone. Stand up confidently (not arrogantly) with genuine

love for even the meanest person in the church. Win God's smile on your life,

through humble, sacrificial obedience and don't care too much about what people think of

you.

6. Always be learning. Reading God's word. Listening to sermons. Confronting

yourself. Repenting. Admitting your faults.

7. Commune with God in deep, long, devoted prayer. Keep him as your closest

confidant. Know his love for you. Feel his presence as the realest

thing you do all day. Speak to him with humility and trust. Know that he

answers prayer. Have huge faith in His goodness.

8. Live holy. Sacrifice every friendship that drags you away from pure devotion

to him. Throw away music and movies that glorify sin. Do not value what the

world values (physical attractiveness, wealth, power, popularity, being liked,

being praised etc.)

9. Hate sin, love righteousness. Recognize Jesus as the source of all your

goodness and you as the source of all that's bad.

10. Be hard on yourself and easy on others. Listen. Sacrifice. Reach out. Don't

show favoritism. Keep your mouth shut when you feel like being annoyed. Be genuine

in your love for others. Don't think of yourself as better than they are. Never look down on anyone. Jesus loves them just as much as he loves you. Do not devalue them or think they are privileged just to gain one ounce of your time. God could use someone that you look down on to teach you and humble you.

11. Give all glory to God.

12. Be always ready to forgive, you will have plenty of opportunity to do it.

13. When attention is drawn to you, that is the time to make it count. Be ready

to speak about God's grace and his kingdom. Don't let pride make you either shy

away, or steal the spotlight. Speak up with confidence for the glory of God. Every

opportunity to tell others how much you love Jesus, should be taken.

14. Remember your influence at home is everything to your ministry. Don't neglect your home, your husband's wants or your family's needs. Discipline your children with diligence. Love them and have fun with them, build into every quickly-passing moment, something of the grace of Christ. Do not give the majority of your time to anything else. If your family dies, so does your husband's credibility and you dishonor the word of God. Ministry does not need to be done by you if your marriage is struggling and your kids are disobedient. Drop everything for their souls. Your husband was called to ministry and you were called to your husband. If you were called to ministry (primarily) God would have kept you single.